This cycle was a failure as well so now it’s back to the drawing board. Dr. Amols wants to do more testing to find out why the IUIs are not working. What we are going to be testing for is my prolactin levels again and my AMH levels. AMH stands for anti-Müllerian hormone which can indicate if I have premature ovarian failure and can be used to figure out what my egg supply looks like. If the AMH levels are low it can indicate that the likelihood of me conceiving and/or carrying to term are incredibly low. This would greatly limit our options for having children. I have had a couple of friends offer to donate eggs as well as to act as a surrogate. Matthew and I have talked about it and are praying about it.
Arizona does not have any laws regarding surrogacy and the legality of contracts regarding it. I am also not sure how comfortable I am with asking a friend to go through a pregnancy just to give up the baby. I know this is a kind of odd concern considering they have volunteered, but that doesn’t change my hesitance to ask a good friend of mine to go through that. Our other option would be to adopt a baby or child. Unfortunately, adopting an infant is prohibitively expensive, and can have it’s own cases of heart ache. In Arizona an adoption isn’t final until after the baby has been born and the paperwork is through the system, so the birth mother can change her mind at any point before then. There is adoption of an older child through the foster system, but this can have it’s own pitfalls and problems. The children who are able to be adopted from the foster system typically have been severely neglected or abused, and I’m not sure Matthew and I are ready to be able to help a child deal with that kind of trauma, which would not be fair to the child. And all of this is simply borrowed trouble if my hormone levels are fine. The tests are Tuesday, but I’m not sure when we will get the results from them.
We continue to trust in God’s timing though all of this and want to thank you all for your prayers and thoughts as we go through this process.
One thought on “Back to the Drawing Board”
Big hugs! The grace with which you are handling this disappointment is an inspiration. Lots of love from us!
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